My unexpected life lessons from learning a new hobby

And why it's never to late to start

Hey everyone,

How are you keeping up?

As painful and difficult things continue to happen around the world, I wanted to dedicate this newsletter to the healing nature of the humble hobby.

How is a hobby different to a side project?

People sometimes ask me what the difference is between a hobby and a side project. Everyone has different definitions but I differentiate hobbies from side projects as they are generally single-skill and don’t tend to build into something different (you just get better). On the flip side, I see side projects as things that might start as a hobby but soon become something else- maybe through growing, involving multiple skills or collaborating with other people.

Hobbies can be very therapeutic. They are opportunities for mastery (which is an important component of self-esteem), and depending on your skill level they can be a great way to switch off your brain and get in a flow state, or conversely satisfy your ‘seeking system’ - that’s the part of our brain that wants to seek, learn and be stimulated.

And on the topic of hobbies… last year, I learnt to properly ride a bike in London.

I know, I know. It’s late to the game.

But learning a skill at a late age - as difficult as it is - is an experience I would recommend to anyone. As we get older, we tend to get ‘good at things’ and desperately hold on to these for our sense of self. We stick within those narrow parameters to avoid looking the fool. DHH talked about this on the Out of Hours podcast, and how he decided to embrace the beginners mindset and learn from scratch how electricity worked.

It can feel very vulnerable to be *that* person apologising every time they step on someone’s foot in a dance class, or the one puffed out at a boxing class, or someone who has always been top of the class who is now genuinely-not-good-at-something. But damn does it feel GOOD to do something new! And I think it’s super important to break out of those fragile parameters if you want to sharpen your mind, keep exploring and cultivate a ‘low ego’ life.

And let me tell you, if you’re getting cycling lessons in a public park in your 30’s, in the pouring rain, with someone wearing a bright neon yellow ‘CYCLE CONFIDENT’* vest - it’s pretty hard to have an ego.

And for me, as I learnt to cycle, I started to see the world again.

I saw things in new ways! My brain made new connections! With the idle time on the bike, I found myself reflecting and seeing metaphorical life lessons with every peddle and traffic light change. Here are some of the things I realised during my meandering, late-life cycling: (if nothing else, it will prove that you can make literally anything a life lesson if you want to)

Things I realised while on the bike:

1. Decisiveness can be the best kindness.

   As Brene Brown says: clear is kind. Pedestrians who hover at a zebra crossing, wondering whether to let a cyclist go, are trying to be kind - but it results in unnecessary energy as cyclists have to predict their intent. Clarity is best.

2. Be considerate to people along the way, as you’ll probably meet again.

   Every cyclist has met an angry overtaker or yeller, who is later parked right next to them at an unexpected traffic lights. It’s not a good experience for anyone. Be kind to everyone you meet along your journey.

3. It’s nice when life seems to happen for you.

   Arriving at a green traffic light and riding through without stopping makes life feel easier. Life is good when things seem to flow. 

4. But being happy when life doesn’t go your way matters more.

   Ride up to a light that goes red, or being slowed down by someone when you’re in a rush, could impact your mood if you let it. You can’t control external circumstances, you can only control your response to them.

5. Hate comes from fear.

   People shout at cyclists (or pedestrians) not because they hate them, but because they’re worried they will run them over (or because they’re worried they’ll be run over). Anger is a secondary emotion! Angry people are usually scared people.

6. Focus on what you want to go towards, not what’s stopping you.

   Quite literally, when learning to ride a bike, looking at the obstacles means you go towards the obstacles. This is also true for life! Be aware of obstacles but not overly involved in them, lest you risk making them your destination.

7. Sometimes the scenic route is better than the fast route.

   Going the fast route can cut 10% of the time but with a 90% decrease in enjoyment  - is it worth it?

8. In life, you can always slow down.

   Yep, the breaks are there for a reason. It is usually up to you how fast you go.

The moral of the story is every activity of life has a lesson! That’s the point of an unfolding life I suppose. And every life lesson is probably based on something as dumb as riding a bike.

What are you going to learn this year? What’s something you’d love to learn but you feel too old to learn?

Let me know in the comments!

Happy hobbying,

Georgia

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*If you’re looking to get confident to cycle on London roads - I couldn’t recommend Cycle Confident more! Loved it.